“Box of Rain: A Tribute To Denise Becker” – Community Trends
In my opinion, one of the most important things CAI-NJ does is recognize and remember those individuals who have meant so much to the chapter and our community association industry here in New Jersey. Names like Dennis Casale, Candice Bladt, Wendell Smith, Jules Frankel, and Denise Becker.
Keeping names alive is so important because it preserves identity and legacy (while also honoring lives and contributions). It connects generations, acknowledges impact and influence, and inspires future actions and decisions. Put simply, keeping names alive is a way of saying that a life mattered. It links us to our past, shapes who we are, and influences who we become.
I have been involved in this chapter since 2005, and I am sorry to say that I did not know Dennis or Candice, and I only had the pleasure of meeting Wendell and Jules once or twice. But I knew Denise, and I’d like to tell you a bit about her.
Denise’s career in community management spanned over 25 years and several positions with various management companies. She started her career as an assistant for the legend, Elaine Warga Murray, PCAM. Denise also went on to achieve her PCAM, and anyone who talked to her knew how important she thought obtaining credentials were for young managers. Over the years, Denise went on to work with Access, Signature/Premier, Homestead, and eventually Corner Property Management Company, LLC, AAMC. It was with Corner where, in my opinion, she flourished not only with respect to her work in community management, but also as both a leader and a mentor to younger community managers.
Denise was not without her struggles, as she would gladly tell you when she got to know you. Later in her life, she had several health-related issues; however, she did not let those issues keep her away from the things she loved – most notably her family, but also the community association world. She bounced back from various setbacks, including lung cancer. I specifically remember Denise’s daughter, Brittany, calling me when I was on my way to a meeting and letting me know Denise’s surgery went well. Among her many other talents, Denise was a fighter.
Before she became president of the chapter in 2017, Denise called me and asked if I would help her come up with ideas for her monthly president’s columns in this magazine. We talked a lot about what she wanted to say in those columns, how much it meant to Denise to serve as chapter president, and what her thoughts were about the community association industry. I think she set the tone in her first column with the following, which encapsulated what she wanted to accomplish as president:
Every member of CAI has the potential of being a mentor or ambassador for CAI. We have an outstanding and active chapter, and, with your help, we can make 2017 even better than the years before. What can you do to be a CAI mentor/ ambassador? Bring a junior or new colleague to an educational seminar or networking event; recruit a new business partner to join our chapter; share your knowledge/experience by joining a committee or writing an article for Community Trends; sponsor an event; contribute to CA-PAC… you get the picture. Our business partners are a wealth of information in their specific fields, and I am certain each one would be very willing to assist in any problem or question you may have regarding their area of expertise. The same goes for those who need guidance and support in their career paths. Managers, there is a scholarship just waiting to help you along your path to getting a CAI designation! If you are not sure how you can help, please feel free to reach out to me or anyone at the chapter office. You won’t regret it.
Denise passed away on Friday, August 20, 2021. At the time, she was attending the CAI National Conference in Las Vegas. She was there to accept an award for Corner Property Management, the company that meant so much to her during her time there. I was there too, as president of the CAI Keystone chapter, and on that Friday during dinner she confided in me that she skipped a few classes to go shopping for gifts for her grandchildren (who she called her “lovelies”). Nonna always had to bring something back from her travels.
After we caught up at dinner, we made plans to catch a cab together to the airport the following morning before we went our separate ways. That was the last time I saw Denise.
Above everything, the thing I loved most about Denise are the memories outside of board meetings or CAI events. Oddly enough, many of those memories revolved around food: our many lunches at Old Man Rafferty’s in Hillsborough; her unusual infatuation with P.F. Chang’s soup; when I crashed her and Greg’s rehearsal dinner at Tumulty’s in New Brunswick, and when she took my kids to the Tiger’s Tale in Montgomery.
In my last president’s column for the CAI-Keystone chapter, I quoted Denise’s words above, and I wrote about her passion for our industry, her unmistakable kindness, and her charm. I also talked about her love for her family and for the Grateful Dead. I still think about Denise almost every day (thanks to a picture I have of me and her hanging in my office) and the many memories her daughter, Brittany, shares on Facebook. And I know others do as well.
As I alluded to above, Denise’s most important contribution to the chapter – and the community association industry – was that she was an incredible mentor to so many people: Miranda Lardieri, Melissa Lloyd, and Mary Grill, to name a few. Every time I see Mary or Miranda or Melissa at a CAI event or a board meeting, we always end up talking about Denise, what she would say about this or that, and how much we miss her.
It’s been five years this month since Denise left us, and I can tell you, it does not get any easier as the days pass. So, let’s continue to tell stories and remember Denise and those other important men and women that came before her. Keep her name and those other names alive. And if you see me at an event, ask me to tell you about the Tumulty’s story I mentioned above. It’s a good one.
To read the original article in Community Trends click here.
